Have you ever been so tired that you could nap on a bed of needles? Well multiply that exhaustion into 10 and then maybe you'll understand what these mothers are going through.
Grab on to your seats, as these mums share these unfortunate things they did when they were sleep deprived, or you might end up rolling on the floor laughing.
My husband is a baby!
"I walked right up to my husband and put our son's pacifier into his mouth."
Gimme sleeeeeeep!
"I kept calling the pediatrician a veterinarian."
That's such a new flavour!
"I'd been up two days after coming home from the hospital and realised that I hadn't eaten, so I made frozen waffles- and poured dish soap on them instead of syrup."
Why so forgetful?
"I finished a full grocery shopping trip, then fastened the baby into her car seat and drove away, leaving all of the groceries in the cart in the parking lot."
Stranger danger!
"I tried to hug the guy who came to set up our internet as he was leaving. I was so tired and used to hugging visitors when they left. He looked at me like I was nuts."
When will I stop being stupid?
"I once tried to put on a pull-up instead of underwear after showering. Then I cried when I couldn't get it on."
I just misplaced my brain!
"I was finally putting myself to bed so I wiped off my makeup and took off my earrings. I was so sleep deprived, though, that I put the dirty makeup wipe in my jewellery box and threw away my earrings."
I got a spaghetti bed!
"My oldest wasn't even two when I had my second child. That first week was a blur. One night I got up to feed the baby and heard snoring as I walked past the kitchen. It turns out I'd forgotten to take the older one out of her high chair, and she'd fallen asleep, using her spaghetti as a pillow."
You stole from a baby?!
"One night, after weeks and weeks of no sleep, I genuinely believed the baby was crying because my husband had taken money from him. My husband guided me back to bed and we had great fun laughing about it the next day."
Such a weak coffee!
"I made coffee without any coffee grinds. It wasn't until the second sip that I realised I was just drinking hot water."
Trendsetter coming through!
"I had to go a whole day at work like this…"
Double the fun!
"In the middle of the night, I tried to change my daughter, but ended up putting a clean diaper on over the dirty one."
Life is full of tragedies!
"After pumping milk at 3 a.m. I walked into the kitchen and dumped it all down the drain. I screamed the second I realised what I did. I'd gone into zombie-cleaning mode without thinking."
Where's my brain at?
"After a long night, I had to run to the drug store. I sat at a red light for what seemed like forever- I even swore at a car that honked at me until I realised it wasn't a red light. It was a stop sign!"
Accidental peep show.
"I was breastfeeding my oldest in my living room wearing only a bra and sweats. There was a knock at the door, so I got up to answer it with my breast still hanging out of my bra. The UPS guy was shocked and kept looking away. I didn't even realise what I'd done until hours later."
Nursing accidents!
"I left the house with my nursing bra on both sides flopped down."
Panic mode: ON!
"One night I realised my whole family was in the room with me, but no one was holding the baby. Panicked, I yelled, 'Where's the baby?!' My husband looked straight at me and said, 'Um, honey, you're nursing her.'"
What the hell Hooman?
"I filled a sippy with milk and handed it to the dog. When he didn't take it, I got annoyed and said, "Well? Here you go!" It took me a full five seconds to realise he wasn't the 2-year-old."
So exhausted it hurts!
"I grabbed my husband's crotch- HARD- as he was rolling over because I thought he was the baby about to roll out of bed."
Too tired to go to the loo!
"I got up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night and was surprised to find I felt warm and wet. It turns out I was so tired that I was peeing on the couch instead of in the toilet. I had literally pulled down my pants, sat down on the couch, and started peeing as if I were on the toilet. I just added that to the list of bodily fluids I had to clean up that night."
No comments:
Post a Comment